Patience...Where Can I Get Some?

"Patience is a virtue" my mom used to tell me.

I have a REALLY big problem with being patient!!! It's no secret, just ask Allen. Lol
Let me tell ya a little story. In the weeks I have been taking DCI at one point I decided to start charting my BBT. Well, that chart showed that I did in fact ovulate. Long story made short I messed things up. I did it MY way, instead of the right way. NOW I've added weeks (not counting the months it will take for the planets to align just right) on to the time I'll be waiting to actually see if my body really will do an entire cycle. If it does...then Al and I can hopefully create a mini-me (actually I'd prefer a mini-Al...or two) I am sooo irritated with myself!! Grrr!! If I had only listen to my mom and learned to be patient!
This poem came to mind today as I was doing yard work and kicking myself in the caboose.

My Father’s way may twist and turn.
My heart may throb and ache.
But in my soul I’m glad I know
He makes no mistake.

My cherished plans may go astray.
My hopes may fade away.
But still I’ll trust my Lord to lead
For He does know the way.

Tho night be dark and it may seem
That day will never break;
I’ll pin my faith, my all in Him,
He makes no mistake.

There’s so much I cannot see,
My eyesight far too dim;
But come what may, I’ll simply trust
And leave it all to Him.

For by and by the mist will lift
And plain it all He’ll make
Through all the way, tho dark to me,
He made not one mistake.

A. M. Overton (1932)

When am I going to find the faith I know I should have? If I had more faith I think it would make the waiting game easier to endure. *sigh* I mean, I know that He doesn't make mistakes and things go the way they do because it is the best way. Right now though with the possibility being sooo close I can taste it...everyday seems like a lifetime!!! Then brainiac me goes and prolongs the wait...smart...real smart.

Hey if anyone out there has a time machine that they would lend out that would be great! I don't want to change anything in the future I just want to check it out...see what happens...ya know? Ahh, if it were just that simple.

Happy B-day My Knight in Shining Armor!

I can't believe my sweetheart is 35!!! And every year he gets better and better! I just love this guy!!! I thank Heavenly Father everyday for blessing me with such an awesome husband. Not that he's perfect...but a lot closer than I am. I think I married up. He's got such a strong testimony, he's the smartest guy I know, and he loves me unconditionally. What a man!!!
I just worry...are we too old be trying to get pregnant and barely start a family? If we got really lucky and he gets me knocked up before Aug., which he's been threatin' to do for a decade, the baby could be born before his 36th b-day but still that would make him over 50 when the kid graduates. Ahhh! Half way to the grave! Thinking about this I'm seriously wondering if we should just not worry about it and just be happy with our fur-babies...hmmm.
But at the same time I have to look at it this way too. Right now would be a perfect time because our Mona Vie business is starting to take off and if we work really hard within the next year Allen could be a stay home dad and be there for a lot of the pregnancy...that would make the late start worth it. I can't even imagine if my dad would've been able to be a stay home dad. That would've been so awesome!!!
So, being able to provide the kind of relationship with our children that would be possible with both of us always around to provide support in whatever they do...Okay, I do think it would be okay to start a family now. Especially drinking Mona Vie because the Resveratrol in it stops the aging process (according to Dr. Oz and Dr Schauss) so maybe we would be able to live longer happier more active lives with them. Physically I do actually feel younger now and more energetic than I did like 5 yrs ago. Hadn't thought about it until now. Okay, we'll stay the course of trying to concieve.
Wow! That was quite a venting session. I do worry though about being past our prime baby-making years...but I guess that's only according to "Utah standards" hehehe. Anywhere else in the world we're still too young to be settlin' down and building a family.
Sorry about all that but feels good to let it out. :) Been stewin' on it since last night when I realized it was Allen's birthday today.

Insulin Level Down!!!

So as some know I went and asked a doc to prescribe an insulin blood test. Well, I'm am happy to say that my insulin (after 5 weeks of d-chiro-inositol) has dropped from 43.7 to 10.5!!! YAY!!! Still not low enough but I do have a back-up plan. hehehe. I guess the "acceptable range" is 6 to 25. The closer I can get it to 6 the better so...on to plan B. Still no aunt flo though...hmmm. Oh well, not gonna worry about that I guess until I can get my insulin down a few more points then EVERYTHING will be "normal". Yeah--if there is a normal

Catching Up

I had the best day yesterday!!! I got to catch up with an old friend. Y'all probably know him, it was Rocky. When I answered the door and there he was, he told me I looked the same (bless his heart, he ignored the 100+ lbs I've put on) he made me a bit jealous, he's been going to the gym and working out. Man he's a muscley dude now! In school he was really skinny but he's bulked up and he looks so good! I hadn't seen him for...well...at least 6 or 7 years. We never did get it figured out for sure.
It's amazing to me how things can change so much but yet be so the same.
At first glance he looked so different, but to look at him...he was exactly the same, just a LOT buffer. I can't explain it, it was just so weird! We went to lunch with my mom, to Olive Garden (my fave). She was really excited to see him again too. I had so much fun reminiscing about school days with him. Every memory from Jr High through High School involves him. He said that exact thing while we were driving around. It made me feel so old when we were trying to figure out the last time we saw each other! I still feel like I'm 20 or 21, but DANG I've been out of school for 13 years! That's as many years as I went to school.
I really better get on this baby makin' stuff...my times runnin' out. :) Not really, I know. I still have another decade...me thinks. Everything in the Lord's time.

Sharing My Flowers

Flowers are starting to bloom--yay!

I thought I would just take a minute and share some of my flowers with you. The Bachelor Buttons have surprised us this year. They usually never get as tall as they have evenwith me watering them. They are so pretty and the blooms are like twice the size too.

The Honeysuckle we just planted a couple weeks ago. The same day we planted radishes, potatoes and tomatoes out in the garden. Oh, and a maple tree in the yard. The Myrtle (that's what Mom has always called it anyway) it has been growing around the foundation of this house since long before I was born. I believe it was brought here from Pleasant Grove by my Grandma from her Mom's (my Great-Grandma) yard. We have a rosebush that was started from a rose from my Great-Grandma's yard also. Kind of funny how now that I am older I'm starting to get all sentimental...sigh. I would have a picture of the rose but...they aren't bloomin' yet. The bird, he just flew over my head while I was snapping pictures, probably because I got too close to the bird feeder. He was cute so I had to snap a pic.

This may be of interest, or maybe not...Anywho I finally got a doc to order a lab to see how far my insulin has dropped since I have been taking DCI. I'm pretty excited. I really, really, really, really, and a bunch more reallys, hope that it is within normal range! I'm supposed to call the office in a couple days to find out. I KNOW that it is definately lower by quite a bit, but I don't know if it could drop to 10% of what it was in a months time. I guess I'll find out.

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms!!! Though I don't have the priviledge of being mom yet I have no fear of being a mom because I had the BEST Mom in the ENTIRE world as an example!!!

Growing up we didn't have a lot but mom had even less.
While in school we always felt like we had a ton of homework but mom did more.
When times got tough and I felt like crying mom already was because she hated seeing me unhappy.
The moments when I thought I would rather be dead mom would take me out to lunch and let me know how special I am.
I would start mixing with the wrong crowd and mom would be there helping me see that's not where I really wanted to be.
The days I felt especially ugly and down on myself mom would be there with a compliment on something specific that I could feel good about.
The times I would be leaving to hang out with friends mom never missed the opportunity to remind me I'm not just her daughter...I'm also a Child of God.
I would get myself into a pickle and mom would help me figure out how to get myself out.
My teenage years were hard but they were much harder on mom.
After I was miserably married mom was there to hold my hand and point me in the right direction for help.
During infertility crisis times mom was always there reassuring me that God hadn't forgot about me or the dream he put in my heart. At the same time letting me know she knew she could never understand the heartache, but I know she did ache just as bad just not for the same reason.
Mom isn't just my Mom she's my best-friend-forever. I don't know why I have the priviledge of being her daughter, quite often I feel I don't deserve her. I am so greatful to Heavenly Father for blessing me with such an honor to call her Mom.
Isn't the first picture cute of my mommy! She told me that was her favorite dress. It was red velvet. Not suprising...she's as good a grandma as she is a mom. Can't tell her grandson loves her at all can ya?